Missing the Point

Alden is currently sleeping in what we call “the baby jail.” It’s really just a portable play yard (Is that what they’re called?) to contain baby in lieu of a crib. Until tonight, he’s slept with us in the bed. For whatever reason, mostly because it’s sitting here in our room, we decided to give it a try tonight. Perhaps because he got up for the day at 3am today. Or maybe because we can’t resist trying something new, which is how we wound up becoming parents in the first place.

Baby fell asleep after a hearty nursing at around 9:30, so Damon popped him in. He woke up instantly, but went on to freak my shit out by simply laying there staring at the mesh for 45 minutes until he drifted off to sleep. That is perhaps some parents’ wildest dream, but it made me wonder if he’d be attending special school some day. My mom pointed out that we don’t care if he goes to special school, because he’s still the Best Baby Ever. I take her point.

So now there is a gaping maw, a chasm, of four feet between me and my sleeping son. I think now is the time I’m supposed to be sleeping, but instead I’m hovering nearby to make sure he continues to breathe and thrive through the force of my presence. And I will admit that I kind of hope he cries soon so I can justify swooping him out without looking like a puss.

Edited to add: I’m tired enough, apparently, that Damon just had to point out to me that I’d spelled Alden’s name wrong at the top of this post.

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28 responses to this post.

  1. So, how did you all do?

    Reply

  2. So, how did you all do?

    Reply

    • That night he was back in our bed by 1am.
      But last night he stayed in the baby jail until 6! I mean, except for when I took him into our bed to feed him. But then I would pop him back in. I got to see him a lot, since he ate every two hours. Have I mentioned he eats like a starving hyena?

      Reply

    • That night he was back in our bed by 1am.
      But last night he stayed in the baby jail until 6! I mean, except for when I took him into our bed to feed him. But then I would pop him back in. I got to see him a lot, since he ate every two hours. Have I mentioned he eats like a starving hyena?

      Reply

    • That night he was back in our bed by 1am.
      But last night he stayed in the baby jail until 6! I mean, except for when I took him into our bed to feed him. But then I would pop him back in. I got to see him a lot, since he ate every two hours. Have I mentioned he eats like a starving hyena?

      Reply

    • That night he was back in our bed by 1am.
      But last night he stayed in the baby jail until 6! I mean, except for when I took him into our bed to feed him. But then I would pop him back in. I got to see him a lot, since he ate every two hours. Have I mentioned he eats like a starving hyena?

      Reply

    • That night he was back in our bed by 1am.
      But last night he stayed in the baby jail until 6! I mean, except for when I took him into our bed to feed him. But then I would pop him back in. I got to see him a lot, since he ate every two hours. Have I mentioned he eats like a starving hyena?

      Reply

    • That night he was back in our bed by 1am.
      But last night he stayed in the baby jail until 6! I mean, except for when I took him into our bed to feed him. But then I would pop him back in. I got to see him a lot, since he ate every two hours. Have I mentioned he eats like a starving hyena?

      Reply

  3. So, how did you all do?

    Reply

  4. So, how did you all do?

    Reply

  5. So, how did you all do?

    Reply

  6. So, how did you all do?

    Reply

  7. So, how did you all do?

    Reply

  8. The movie “Matilda” (Which I am probably spelling wrong) has something in it called a “chokey” for locking up bad kids. And we noticed that as a new parent, you are supposed to spend a lot of time locking the baby up. Thus, we had:
    The chokey (crib)
    The porta-chokey (carseat)
    The packa-chokey (pack’n’play)
    The rolla-chokey (stroller)
    The chokeyteria (high chair)
    With our first, we had the chokey in our room for the first few months, but although she slept like an angel in the chokey, I woke up at every infant fit and start. So we ended up moving her to her own room, where she continued to sleep like an angel. I felt very guilty about it but it sure was nice to get some sleep.
    About staring at the mesh – I’m sure you know that new babies love contrasting patterns (black-and-white is best) because those are about all their new eyes can discern. Check the mesh in the same light you laid the baby down in. It’s probably making a black-and-white pattern with whatever is behind it. You probably have two more weeks, maximum, of him being entertained by that.

    Reply

  9. The movie “Matilda” (Which I am probably spelling wrong) has something in it called a “chokey” for locking up bad kids. And we noticed that as a new parent, you are supposed to spend a lot of time locking the baby up. Thus, we had:
    The chokey (crib)
    The porta-chokey (carseat)
    The packa-chokey (pack’n’play)
    The rolla-chokey (stroller)
    The chokeyteria (high chair)
    With our first, we had the chokey in our room for the first few months, but although she slept like an angel in the chokey, I woke up at every infant fit and start. So we ended up moving her to her own room, where she continued to sleep like an angel. I felt very guilty about it but it sure was nice to get some sleep.
    About staring at the mesh – I’m sure you know that new babies love contrasting patterns (black-and-white is best) because those are about all their new eyes can discern. Check the mesh in the same light you laid the baby down in. It’s probably making a black-and-white pattern with whatever is behind it. You probably have two more weeks, maximum, of him being entertained by that.

    Reply

    • I love the chokey.
      I think your should put your baby to sleep in whatever location that will afford the whole family the best rest. Heck, even Dr. Sears says that.
      I’m considering investing in an Angel Care monitor. I know it’s crazy, new-parent behavior, but I can’t help it. Then I’d feel like I had more sane options for baby sleep.

      Reply

    • I love the chokey.
      I think your should put your baby to sleep in whatever location that will afford the whole family the best rest. Heck, even Dr. Sears says that.
      I’m considering investing in an Angel Care monitor. I know it’s crazy, new-parent behavior, but I can’t help it. Then I’d feel like I had more sane options for baby sleep.

      Reply

    • I love the chokey.
      I think your should put your baby to sleep in whatever location that will afford the whole family the best rest. Heck, even Dr. Sears says that.
      I’m considering investing in an Angel Care monitor. I know it’s crazy, new-parent behavior, but I can’t help it. Then I’d feel like I had more sane options for baby sleep.

      Reply

    • I love the chokey.
      I think your should put your baby to sleep in whatever location that will afford the whole family the best rest. Heck, even Dr. Sears says that.
      I’m considering investing in an Angel Care monitor. I know it’s crazy, new-parent behavior, but I can’t help it. Then I’d feel like I had more sane options for baby sleep.

      Reply

    • I love the chokey.
      I think your should put your baby to sleep in whatever location that will afford the whole family the best rest. Heck, even Dr. Sears says that.
      I’m considering investing in an Angel Care monitor. I know it’s crazy, new-parent behavior, but I can’t help it. Then I’d feel like I had more sane options for baby sleep.

      Reply

    • I love the chokey.
      I think your should put your baby to sleep in whatever location that will afford the whole family the best rest. Heck, even Dr. Sears says that.
      I’m considering investing in an Angel Care monitor. I know it’s crazy, new-parent behavior, but I can’t help it. Then I’d feel like I had more sane options for baby sleep.

      Reply

  10. The movie “Matilda” (Which I am probably spelling wrong) has something in it called a “chokey” for locking up bad kids. And we noticed that as a new parent, you are supposed to spend a lot of time locking the baby up. Thus, we had:
    The chokey (crib)
    The porta-chokey (carseat)
    The packa-chokey (pack’n’play)
    The rolla-chokey (stroller)
    The chokeyteria (high chair)
    With our first, we had the chokey in our room for the first few months, but although she slept like an angel in the chokey, I woke up at every infant fit and start. So we ended up moving her to her own room, where she continued to sleep like an angel. I felt very guilty about it but it sure was nice to get some sleep.
    About staring at the mesh – I’m sure you know that new babies love contrasting patterns (black-and-white is best) because those are about all their new eyes can discern. Check the mesh in the same light you laid the baby down in. It’s probably making a black-and-white pattern with whatever is behind it. You probably have two more weeks, maximum, of him being entertained by that.

    Reply

  11. The movie “Matilda” (Which I am probably spelling wrong) has something in it called a “chokey” for locking up bad kids. And we noticed that as a new parent, you are supposed to spend a lot of time locking the baby up. Thus, we had:
    The chokey (crib)
    The porta-chokey (carseat)
    The packa-chokey (pack’n’play)
    The rolla-chokey (stroller)
    The chokeyteria (high chair)
    With our first, we had the chokey in our room for the first few months, but although she slept like an angel in the chokey, I woke up at every infant fit and start. So we ended up moving her to her own room, where she continued to sleep like an angel. I felt very guilty about it but it sure was nice to get some sleep.
    About staring at the mesh – I’m sure you know that new babies love contrasting patterns (black-and-white is best) because those are about all their new eyes can discern. Check the mesh in the same light you laid the baby down in. It’s probably making a black-and-white pattern with whatever is behind it. You probably have two more weeks, maximum, of him being entertained by that.

    Reply

  12. The movie “Matilda” (Which I am probably spelling wrong) has something in it called a “chokey” for locking up bad kids. And we noticed that as a new parent, you are supposed to spend a lot of time locking the baby up. Thus, we had:
    The chokey (crib)
    The porta-chokey (carseat)
    The packa-chokey (pack’n’play)
    The rolla-chokey (stroller)
    The chokeyteria (high chair)
    With our first, we had the chokey in our room for the first few months, but although she slept like an angel in the chokey, I woke up at every infant fit and start. So we ended up moving her to her own room, where she continued to sleep like an angel. I felt very guilty about it but it sure was nice to get some sleep.
    About staring at the mesh – I’m sure you know that new babies love contrasting patterns (black-and-white is best) because those are about all their new eyes can discern. Check the mesh in the same light you laid the baby down in. It’s probably making a black-and-white pattern with whatever is behind it. You probably have two more weeks, maximum, of him being entertained by that.

    Reply

  13. The movie “Matilda” (Which I am probably spelling wrong) has something in it called a “chokey” for locking up bad kids. And we noticed that as a new parent, you are supposed to spend a lot of time locking the baby up. Thus, we had:
    The chokey (crib)
    The porta-chokey (carseat)
    The packa-chokey (pack’n’play)
    The rolla-chokey (stroller)
    The chokeyteria (high chair)
    With our first, we had the chokey in our room for the first few months, but although she slept like an angel in the chokey, I woke up at every infant fit and start. So we ended up moving her to her own room, where she continued to sleep like an angel. I felt very guilty about it but it sure was nice to get some sleep.
    About staring at the mesh – I’m sure you know that new babies love contrasting patterns (black-and-white is best) because those are about all their new eyes can discern. Check the mesh in the same light you laid the baby down in. It’s probably making a black-and-white pattern with whatever is behind it. You probably have two more weeks, maximum, of him being entertained by that.

    Reply

  14. The movie “Matilda” (Which I am probably spelling wrong) has something in it called a “chokey” for locking up bad kids. And we noticed that as a new parent, you are supposed to spend a lot of time locking the baby up. Thus, we had:
    The chokey (crib)
    The porta-chokey (carseat)
    The packa-chokey (pack’n’play)
    The rolla-chokey (stroller)
    The chokeyteria (high chair)
    With our first, we had the chokey in our room for the first few months, but although she slept like an angel in the chokey, I woke up at every infant fit and start. So we ended up moving her to her own room, where she continued to sleep like an angel. I felt very guilty about it but it sure was nice to get some sleep.
    About staring at the mesh – I’m sure you know that new babies love contrasting patterns (black-and-white is best) because those are about all their new eyes can discern. Check the mesh in the same light you laid the baby down in. It’s probably making a black-and-white pattern with whatever is behind it. You probably have two more weeks, maximum, of him being entertained by that.

    Reply

  15. I love the chokey.
    I think your should put your baby to sleep in whatever location that will afford the whole family the best rest. Heck, even Dr. Sears says that.
    I’m considering investing in an Angel Care monitor. I know it’s crazy, new-parent behavior, but I can’t help it. Then I’d feel like I had more sane options for baby sleep.

    Reply

  16. That night he was back in our bed by 1am.
    But last night he stayed in the baby jail until 6! I mean, except for when I took him into our bed to feed him. But then I would pop him back in. I got to see him a lot, since he ate every two hours. Have I mentioned he eats like a starving hyena?

    Reply

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