jaysaint Getting it all down on paper…

Today was our sixth open house.

Manhattan, being too cool to do anything the regular way, does not participate in the MLS for real estate. How, you are wondering, do people know about your apartment, then? Well, mostly they don’t. Brokers fight and compete just like gangs. Very few co-broke, which mean you only ever see the apartments your broker’s office listed. It’s crazy. So. You have a lot of open houses, which your broker will list in the New York Times.

Today was the first time we got a serious nibble. A couple came back for a second look. They stayed for 45 minutes. They asked a lot of questions. Our broker is calling them back tomorrow with answers. She said, “This is very positive.”

Oh please oh please oh please let them make an offer, and a good one.

The timing would be perfect, since we’re spending all of the week of the 9th in Knoxville. I’m going to work with my new team face-to-face and I’m taking along Damon and Alden. I can’t be separated from Alden yet. Breast milk still makes up 90-100% of what he eats in the day. And, frankly, I’m just not willing to be away from him overnight yet — not even for one night. Right now my only plan is that I’ll stop pumping at work (which I loathe) when he’s a year old. Other than that I’ll let nature take its course.

It’s a terrible choice to have to make, actually. I’m 37. It took me a year and a half to get pregnant with Alden. By breastfeeding for so long I’m using up a great deal of the very slim chance I would ever have to get pregnant again. Ultimately we decided that nursing him is the only sure thing, so that’s what we’re going to do. It would break my heart if I weaned him to get pregnant and it didn’t even work. We’re still holding out for our adoption to come through. But the China program has slowed so dramatically that (in my opinion) we can’t count on that happening. So Alden may be an only child.

I didn’t actually mean to go down that road. Just following my nose…

Anyway, to celebrate our potential offer, I made a dinner that is far too salty.

See if you stop staring at this hilarious picture. I cannot.

Hey Smart Friends —

My sister-in-law needs a new computer. Basically, all she needs is a glorified web browsing and email sending machine. No bells. No whistles. Saving cash is paramount.

Any suggestions?

I just… why do I watch Oprah when she’s doing shows on horrific, tragic deaths of children?

I know why. I watch because I think it will make me more careful. I know it will make me more careful. And it bolsters my resolve to demand caution from others, even when they make fun of me for it.

But it doesn’t mean I don’t want to just dig a hole and get in.

On a much lighter note, my friend Jodi was here with her adorable baby Hayden. He’s just a few weeks younger than Alden. There’s not much sweeter than the sight of him with his lovey — a tiny blanket with a giraffe head. Jodi said whenever he’s tired she just hands him the lovey. He rubs the giraffe all over his face and then conks right out. Today she came by with one she picked up for Alden. He’s clutching it in his sleep as I type. This thing is magic. Turns out it’s made by a company called Angel Dear and they come in a zillion varieties on Amazon. I ordered five more — giraffe (doubles), tiger, frog, monkey and sheep. I really want one of each, but can’t quite justify that.

Now that I know we will be trading in subway for freeway and the High Line for hydrangeas I just want to go. Now. I’m parked in a sterile little cube (It’s called “hotel-ing” in corporatese.) and there’s very little noise or motion around me. But I can’t make any commotion of my own because I don’t want to disturb. Did I mention the fascists in tech support won’t let me have iTunes on my computer? At least I have a TV. I spent all day watching Telemundo. For work. Or something.

It seems Manhattan is determined to show me its hind end. The unremitting windy gray blah chills were the perfect backdrop for the dude I saw peeing on the A train today. I bought some diapers on Amazon yesterday and got a pop up box that NY state law now will require Amazon to charge sales tax on my purchases. I have had it!

For those of you who want to argue that we should pay state sales tax on our Amazon purchases: I invite you to check my pay stub to see how much NY and NYC already Hoover out of my pocket. If you’re not convinced, then I will invite you to bite me.

I spent a little time in the office today with my calculator, trying to justify moving to Knoxville now and paying for a cheap apartment until the Inwood place sells. I actually could make the math work. Tennessee doesn’t have an income tax, so just switching residences would save so much money that we could pay a cheap rent. But logistically it’s too ugly considering my only good reason is because I’m bone weary of New York.

Alden and I spent some time making wookie noises at each other tonight and that has helped settle me. So, patience.

I can hear Alden and Damon dancing to Van Halen in the bedroom.

Tonight I resolve to just be grateful.