Nursing ??

I think I’ve got the right Friends to answer this too-specific-for-Kellymom question:

Alden is still nursing at night. I know, I said we were going to stop that. He has entirely weaned himself during the day (Awesome, the total reverse of what I was trying). And he will go to sleep for Damon. But if it’s me putting him down, nursing it must be. He will often wake up during the night and ask to nurse — maybe twice. It usually only takes about 30 seconds to do the trick. I don’t know if he’ll hang on longer once I’m making baby milk again or not. I honestly don’t know if he’s getting anything now.

Up until now I’ve been thinking it’s neutral to good because it should help get my production up. I have never been one of those fortune fountain-of-milk moms. But now I’m worried about those first few days/weeks when I may not be making much. What if I nurse him and five minutes later the baby needs to eat? Am I worrying over nothing or is the baby going to wither like a fall leaf?

I’ve been very reluctant to hurry Alden along his path. For a few reasons. The first is that he’s generally independent. He moves along without a lot of fuss. The only thing that will get him truly worked up is being denied nursing when he asks. Since he’s normally so agreeable and redirect-able I’m left to infer that this is something he still needs. The second is that we both enjoy it. We’re apart all day most days. Those few minutes in the middle of the night are kind of precious.

Last time we tried to night wean was about six months ago. We all talked about it then. Alden’s pediatrician was the one who convinced me to leave it alone. He said Alden seemed already on his way and if it wasn’t any real hardship to me then he’d just let nature continue to take its course.

Damon thinks I should head back to the guest room for a few nights. Which could work. But eventually I’ll be back to bed. How to explain to a 22-month-old that I’m not going to nurse him anymore? Especially when he’s about to see me feeding the baby in the night. Moving Alden out of our bed is not an option. Both because his room is far from ours, and because we love having him in our bed and he loves being there.

Any thoughts are much appreciated.

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12 responses to this post.

  1. You’re worrying too much. ๐Ÿ™‚ Nursing a toddler will help your milk come in faster and more comfortably (less engorgement) and you’ll make plenty of colostrum for NewBaby in the interim. You never run out of milk. Colostrum is produced on-demand, not stored in the milk ducts for any length of time.
    If you enjoy night-nursing, I also don’t see a reason to stop that, either. If you do want to work on night-weaning, trying Dr. Jay Gordon’s nightweaning method might help.

    Reply

  2. You’re worrying too much. ๐Ÿ™‚ Nursing a toddler will help your milk come in faster and more comfortably (less engorgement) and you’ll make plenty of colostrum for NewBaby in the interim. You never run out of milk. Colostrum is produced on-demand, not stored in the milk ducts for any length of time.
    If you enjoy night-nursing, I also don’t see a reason to stop that, either. If you do want to work on night-weaning, trying Dr. Jay Gordon’s nightweaning method might help.

    Reply

    • You worry too much. According to you, the choices you made/make have produced a loving agreeable child. Obviously, whatever you are doing is working. When it is time to stop nursing, you wont feel so conflicted about it and most likely, neither will he.

      Reply

    • Right! Colostrum on demand. I have a lot of remembering to do. Thank you.

      Reply

  3. You worry too much. According to you, the choices you made/make have produced a loving agreeable child. Obviously, whatever you are doing is working. When it is time to stop nursing, you wont feel so conflicted about it and most likely, neither will he.

    Reply

  4. Right! Colostrum on demand. I have a lot of remembering to do. Thank you.

    Reply

  5. You’re so right. Everything we’ve done that has gone well has been driven primarily by instinct. Thank you.

    Reply

  6. Posted by Anonymous on September 20, 2009 at 2:16 am

    hope i’m doing this right…
    so- night weaning. yes indeed.
    we just started to have these conversations in the middle of the night (also around 2 yrs…)
    Harper would try to nurse, and I would say, “no, the mum-mums have gone to sleep. harper needs to go to sleep too.” We’d go back and forth having these little hilarious “arguments” (funny if it weren’t in the middle of the night) and eventually she’d give up. Sometimes Daniel would take her over to his side of the bed, to get her ‘off my body’ for awhile. Of course, wearing something to bed that didn’t grant access was key as well. It was hard for a week or so – but then worked out.
    of course – if the baby comes and is nursing at night – all bets are off. but i love ya sister! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

  7. Posted by Anonymous on September 20, 2009 at 2:16 am

    hope i’m doing this right…
    so- night weaning. yes indeed.
    we just started to have these conversations in the middle of the night (also around 2 yrs…)
    Harper would try to nurse, and I would say, “no, the mum-mums have gone to sleep. harper needs to go to sleep too.” We’d go back and forth having these little hilarious “arguments” (funny if it weren’t in the middle of the night) and eventually she’d give up. Sometimes Daniel would take her over to his side of the bed, to get her ‘off my body’ for awhile. Of course, wearing something to bed that didn’t grant access was key as well. It was hard for a week or so – but then worked out.
    of course – if the baby comes and is nursing at night – all bets are off. but i love ya sister! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply

    • Re: hope i’m doing this right…
      Yup, I think the baby is going to come along and blow any progress we’ve made.
      Congratulations on hitting full term! Race you to delivery.

      Reply

  8. Re: hope i’m doing this right…
    Yup, I think the baby is going to come along and blow any progress we’ve made.
    Congratulations on hitting full term! Race you to delivery.

    Reply

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