Making Muscle

Tomorrow my gym opens. I’m making excuses already, mostly revolving around the fact that the coming week is pretty overwhelming. I’ll be up in front of people no less than three times and doing some red carpet reporting for The Songwriters Hall of Fame Awards. PS — I have no idea what to do on a red carpet reporter line.

See how I immediately segued into excuses and diversions? But the truth is I really do want to go to the gym, and sometimes I even have fun while I’m there. You know what’s the coolest part of my new gym? They provide everything but sneakers. You just go in and grab whatever kind of workout clothes you want, get sweaty, toss the clothes into the hamper, shower and put your street clothes back on. Isn’t that cool? Some people are saying it’s gross to wear the gym’s clothes, but I couldn’t care less. It’s all laundered. And I love not having to drag clothes around. We also all get a permanent locker so I don’t even have to lug the shoes. So while I’m not making any promises, I think the outlook is at least a little bit promising. I sure would love to raise my fanny an inch or two.

Two media notes:

1. Isn’t it time for Paris Hilton to stop being famous? Please? Please? I just feel exhausted when I see her.

2. We’re going to see The Lieutenant of Inishmore on Wednesday night. I’m kind of nervous as I’ve heard it’s utterly brutal. Maybe that’s one where I hope our tickets are near the back.

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27 responses to this post.

  1. I didn’t know you were going to be reporting again. Is this for Redbook or some other news organ?
    Do you know what “fanny” means in the UK?
    2. Is that a stage play?

    Reply

  2. I didn’t know you were going to be reporting again. Is this for Redbook or some other news organ?
    Do you know what “fanny” means in the UK?
    2. Is that a stage play?

    Reply

    • 1. It is indeed for Redbook. I thought I would try making up a Red Carpet Slideshow series. Monday I’m going to the Gracie Awards to get more photos. I didn’t do that well at the Hall of Fame, but I’m sure I’ll get better with practice. I did yell “Stevie! Stevie!” at Stevie Wonder and got him to look over for a picture.
      I do know what Fanny means in the UK, but I believe I have a fully US-based readership here on LJ so I didn’t sweat it.
      2. Yes. And it was just okay. It did have a brilliant twist at the end.

      Reply

      • 1. But I thought you were the boss of the website! Don’t you have minions to go out and do the actual reportage for you?
        I do know what Fanny means in the UK, but I believe I have a fully US-based readership here on LJ so I didn’t sweat it.
        But you reckoned without me! Me, who:
        – has visited the UK several times, and
        – is twelve.

      • It really was the combo that got me. I do assume most people know about the British fanny but I overlooked the giggle factor.
        I actually had a friend named Fanny when I lived in Atlanta, and my Irish friend Dave never did find an end to the hilarity of that fact.

      • It really was the combo that got me. I do assume most people know about the British fanny but I overlooked the giggle factor.
        I actually had a friend named Fanny when I lived in Atlanta, and my Irish friend Dave never did find an end to the hilarity of that fact.

      • 1. But I thought you were the boss of the website! Don’t you have minions to go out and do the actual reportage for you?
        I do know what Fanny means in the UK, but I believe I have a fully US-based readership here on LJ so I didn’t sweat it.
        But you reckoned without me! Me, who:
        – has visited the UK several times, and
        – is twelve.

    • 1. It is indeed for Redbook. I thought I would try making up a Red Carpet Slideshow series. Monday I’m going to the Gracie Awards to get more photos. I didn’t do that well at the Hall of Fame, but I’m sure I’ll get better with practice. I did yell “Stevie! Stevie!” at Stevie Wonder and got him to look over for a picture.
      I do know what Fanny means in the UK, but I believe I have a fully US-based readership here on LJ so I didn’t sweat it.
      2. Yes. And it was just okay. It did have a brilliant twist at the end.

      Reply

  3. I didn’t know you were going to be reporting again. Is this for Redbook or some other news organ?
    Do you know what “fanny” means in the UK?
    2. Is that a stage play?

    Reply

  4. Okay, I admit I wouldn’t wear the gym’s clothes, but I don’t necessarily think it is gross if someone else does.
    Does this mean you don’t like Paris’ new single?

    Reply

  5. Okay, I admit I wouldn’t wear the gym’s clothes, but I don’t necessarily think it is gross if someone else does.
    Does this mean you don’t like Paris’ new single?

    Reply

    • I must be far lazier than you. Of course, not having a car is one of the major motivating factors for not wanting to haul around sweaty clothes. But I’m sure I’d use theirs even if I did, because if there is a corner I will cut it if possible.
      I admit to being out of the loop enough to not have heard the single. More’s the pity for me, I’m sure.

      Reply

    • I must be far lazier than you. Of course, not having a car is one of the major motivating factors for not wanting to haul around sweaty clothes. But I’m sure I’d use theirs even if I did, because if there is a corner I will cut it if possible.
      I admit to being out of the loop enough to not have heard the single. More’s the pity for me, I’m sure.

      Reply

  6. Okay, I admit I wouldn’t wear the gym’s clothes, but I don’t necessarily think it is gross if someone else does.
    Does this mean you don’t like Paris’ new single?

    Reply

  7. Paris Hilton is herpes. She’s ugly. She’s painful. She won’t go away.

    Reply

  8. Paris Hilton is herpes. She’s ugly. She’s painful. She won’t go away.

    Reply

  9. Paris Hilton is herpes. She’s ugly. She’s painful. She won’t go away.

    Reply

  10. Since you’re a media big wig, can’t you do something about Paris Hilton’s popularity?
    Personally, I can’t deal with the whole Brad/Angelina baby thing anymore. They seem to be using that baby as much as the media. They both annoyed me seperately – as a couple (and as parents) they make me want to scream.
    I think the most important thing to do as a red carpet reporter is to scream your questions about what the stars are wearing really, really loud.

    Reply

  11. Since you’re a media big wig, can’t you do something about Paris Hilton’s popularity?
    Personally, I can’t deal with the whole Brad/Angelina baby thing anymore. They seem to be using that baby as much as the media. They both annoyed me seperately – as a couple (and as parents) they make me want to scream.
    I think the most important thing to do as a red carpet reporter is to scream your questions about what the stars are wearing really, really loud.

    Reply

    • I did say, “Your jacket is lovely” to an older lady named Pat Crosby. But she was standing about six inches away and looking right at me, so I didn’t have it in my heart to scream.
      I will work on the Paris Hilton thing.

      Reply

    • I did say, “Your jacket is lovely” to an older lady named Pat Crosby. But she was standing about six inches away and looking right at me, so I didn’t have it in my heart to scream.
      I will work on the Paris Hilton thing.

      Reply

  12. Since you’re a media big wig, can’t you do something about Paris Hilton’s popularity?
    Personally, I can’t deal with the whole Brad/Angelina baby thing anymore. They seem to be using that baby as much as the media. They both annoyed me seperately – as a couple (and as parents) they make me want to scream.
    I think the most important thing to do as a red carpet reporter is to scream your questions about what the stars are wearing really, really loud.

    Reply

  13. 1. It is indeed for Redbook. I thought I would try making up a Red Carpet Slideshow series. Monday I’m going to the Gracie Awards to get more photos. I didn’t do that well at the Hall of Fame, but I’m sure I’ll get better with practice. I did yell “Stevie! Stevie!” at Stevie Wonder and got him to look over for a picture.
    I do know what Fanny means in the UK, but I believe I have a fully US-based readership here on LJ so I didn’t sweat it.
    2. Yes. And it was just okay. It did have a brilliant twist at the end.

    Reply

  14. I must be far lazier than you. Of course, not having a car is one of the major motivating factors for not wanting to haul around sweaty clothes. But I’m sure I’d use theirs even if I did, because if there is a corner I will cut it if possible.
    I admit to being out of the loop enough to not have heard the single. More’s the pity for me, I’m sure.

    Reply

  15. I did say, “Your jacket is lovely” to an older lady named Pat Crosby. But she was standing about six inches away and looking right at me, so I didn’t have it in my heart to scream.
    I will work on the Paris Hilton thing.

    Reply

  16. 1. But I thought you were the boss of the website! Don’t you have minions to go out and do the actual reportage for you?
    I do know what Fanny means in the UK, but I believe I have a fully US-based readership here on LJ so I didn’t sweat it.
    But you reckoned without me! Me, who:
    – has visited the UK several times, and
    – is twelve.

    Reply

  17. It really was the combo that got me. I do assume most people know about the British fanny but I overlooked the giggle factor.
    I actually had a friend named Fanny when I lived in Atlanta, and my Irish friend Dave never did find an end to the hilarity of that fact.

    Reply

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