jaysaint Getting it all down on paper…

First, thanks to Steakums and Dinoczar! This morning I was running around the apartment screaming, “I don’t have any clothes!!!” when the UPS man rang my buzzer. My day was saved by a soft, mossy green turleneck. Seriously, you guys are lifesavers. I’m sending off a check to at least cover the shipping. Keep an eye out, as we use bank-issued checks and the envelopes look like junk mail. So open all your junk mail from Chase for the next few days.

I also want to take a moment to congratulate a friend who just made a major life decision that is good for her and hers. I’m so proud of you and excited for this new chapter. And I feel for you, because those leap-and-the-net-will-appear moments can really take it out of you.

It’s so stormy today that my umbrella bascially disintegrated while I was walking to the subway. Once I got inside I had to beat it against the floor until I had broken enough spokes in the same direction to fit it into the garbage can.

We launch our all-new site in five days. Taking deep breaths.

Hey Lemon, Faye Wattleton was feeling your pain today. I just got this press release. She can get an amen from me:

Debate ignores misogynist content in the Imus fiasco

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(New York, NY) – Although the debate on Imus’ recent remarks against the Rutgers’ women’s basketball team has appropriately focused on the racial speech, one critical element that must be highlighted is the denigration of the young women for their gender.
Imus referred to the Rutgers’ team members as ‘hos,’ a sexual slur that humiliates and trivializes women and is indicative of the double-standard used in the coverage of female v. male sports. In addition, Imus’ reference to the players as ‘some rough girls’ diminished the player’s athletic and academic accomplishments.

“We can’t oversee the degradation to which these women have been subjected on the basis of their gender,” said Faye Wattleton, President of the Center for the Advancement of Women and lifelong advocate for women’s equality. “Despite the incontrovertible accomplishments of these women, Imus demeaned them with a most prejudiced speech.”

CFAW urges all media to expand on the Imus’ incident by addressing the generalized use of derogatory language and images in the media, a serious issue that affects the public’s perception and treatment of women and minorities.

The Center for the Advancement of Women has publicly condemned the use of hateful discourse against women by other public figures, most notably Ann Coulter. Last year, the Center launched Ann Coulter Does Not Speak for Me, a public awareness campaign that responds to Coulter’s attacks on women by providing research-based information and a petition her opponents can sign.

Zoe the cat is almost 17 years old. She has been with me since shortly after I started college. She and I have lived in countless houses and apartments together, in four different cities and with various husbands and roommates. In that time, she’s been exposed to great deal of media. There’s always plenty of music. I love video games. And while I’m not proud to say so, our television is frequently yakking away.

Never, ever has she paid the slightest bit of attention to any form of electronic noise or lights.

That’s why it’s so funny to see her have such huge reaction to The Muppet Show. Season 1 is my latest Netflix selection. And oh the slinking, the cringing, the staring, the stalking. She is transfixed, and does not seem pleased by these singing puppets.

On the other hand, I’m tremendously pleased by them and she’s just going to have to suck it up. Sandy Duncan is the guest star as I type, and the Swedish Chef is making bagels.

Happy Birthday to Youououououo!
Happy Birthday to Youououououo!
Happy Birthday Dear Steakums!
Happy Birthday to Youououououououou!

I hope your day is filled with cake.

I’m so thirsty. There are not enough bottles of water in the world. My new favorite treat is what we call “the seltzer juice.” 1/4 to 1/3 cup pomegranate juice and 3/4 to 2/3 lime seltzer water.

The punch line of my week is my doctor telling me to gain weight. It’s just a hard thing to synthesize being told. I’ve never been overweight, but never been underweight either. And suddenly, I don’t weigh enough. It’s no big deal and I think once I convinced her that I’m not resisting gaining she seemed satisfied. I’m still in the “Food? Food is gross” phase. I have it on good authority that will shortly change into something where no one’s dinner is safe.

In non-uterine news, I continue to drag my site kicking and screaming toward the relaunch. It’s scheduled for about two weeks from now. If I’ve been absent, and continue to be so until then, you will know why. It will be worth it as our new site is going to march out and massacre all other web sites with its awesomness. I will be sure to shamelessly plug it here when the time comes.

Minor Survivor Spoiler Alert
Does anyone here watch Survivor? Because all I can say about tonight is: Hooray! I hate a whiner. (Unless the whiner is funny.)

My work is done for the day, so I’m going to grab my Battlestar Galactica podcast and let Ron Moore talk me to sleep.